Over on The Tonight Show, 19-year-old rapper Lil Yachty spit what may be the most perfect Simpsons-related rap of all time. In 14 verses, Yachty shouts out 59 different characters from the Simpsons cartoon universe, and he goes deep — sure, Homer and Marge are in there, but he’s also got McBain, LuAnn, and the whole peripheral crew, proving he’s as hardcore a Simpsons fan as they come.
Here are the full lyrics, in case you want to rap along:
You’ve got Homer, Marge, Lisa and Bart
You got Maggie and Santa’s Little Helper to start
At Seven-Forty-Two, in a pink lil house
Where everything’s coming up Milhouse, D’oh!Grampa’s yelling at clouds
Willie’s really keeping busy keeping the grounds
Wiggum is commissioner, incompetent officer
And his son Ralph’s doing the un-possibleSpringfielders, ask Quimby, there’s plenty
The black one is Carl, the white one is Lenny
So many seasons, you can’t seem to settle on
One, ish longer than NahasapeemapetilonGo to Kwik-E-Mart, learn what Apu earns,
Hans Moleman was saying boo-urns
Like the Sea Captain, I’m going overboard
I, for one, welcome our new insect overlordsLike Brockman, gimme a Duff, man
I wanna take a Malk but I wanna get drunk, man
Barney’s the barfly at Moe’s who falls
Down while Mike Rotch gives phony callsOr Otto Mann on “The Bus That Couldn’t Slow Down”
Need a dump truck of money, call Krusty the Clown
Steer clear of Nelson, he’ll laugh at you openly
It’s worse than hearing “Okilly Dokilly”Flanders, store just for left handers,
Bar in the basement, call in Rex Banner
Two sons called Todd and Rod
Whose mom Maude got t-shirt clocked to GodAnd she’s smoking, like Selma and Patty
Comic Book Guy’s kind of a fatty
Like Fat Tony and Uter with his chocolate
Looking for another? Did you check your pocket?I’mma school you like Chalmers and Skinner
Serving up steamed hams for dinner
I’m on fire, well, that’s a fallacy
It’s really Aurora Borealis, see?Burns got a bear and the bear is Bobo
Burns got goons, Crusher and Lowblow,
Nothing beats stabbin’ folks with my hobo
Knife, bring back Sheriff Lobo!Flow so sick, someone call a doctor!
Hibbert is with it but Nick is awful,
Hi everybody, it’s Mr. McGreg,
With a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg!Smithers can’t enter the League of Extra-Horny Gentlemen,
There’s Itchy, there’s Scratchy, and there’s Gentle Ben,
They’re all animals, call the hound dogs
Which are back like Alf with the Alf PogsArnie Pye, Artie Ziff and Disco Stu
Martin Prince, McBain, Kirk, LuAnn, Lou
Sideshow Bob, Troy McClure, Radioactive Man
Who had a Fallout Boy before the bandI got more lines than Bart with chalk,
I spit more lines than Maggie’s talked,
That’s 59 names with more to report, Bort
Until next time, “Eat my shorts!”
